Elsi Wu is really a middle-aged, obese Italian man. A perky CAP junior who lives for ESPN, Superbowl Sunday, Poms, and food, she watches Friends and Oprah RELIGIOUSLY along with any Redskins/Maryland games (you know, normal activities for the average obese Italian man). Instead of working during class, she naps, plays Text Twist, and listens to country music. Elsi tends to have very tragic experiences involving dead animals and would rather not relive them.