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Dec. 8, 2005

snoWatch: When will the lies end?

by Alex Mazerov, Page Editor, Christopher Consolino, Page Editor and Grace Harter, Page Editor
From the suits: All Montgomery County Public Schools will be closed today, Friday, December 9, due to weather conditions.

After the disappointment that was Tuesday's "snow," we've decided to spare everyone the emotional trauma of two letdowns in a single week. To that effect, we've adopted a policy of conservative forecasts and gratuitous HTML formatting, for the betterment of mankind.

With so many rumors of "heavy snow" dropping a delicious "7-9 inches" on Montgomery County, we figured it was time to put on our gloves, boots, sweater vests and other winter apparel and do some field reporting to bring you snoWatch uncensored.

The following notebook entries detail events that may have happened on Dec. 7, 2005.
1:57:26 p.m.: Not snowing.
1:57:26:1/2 p.m.: Still not snowing.
1:58:27 p.m.: Snow falls off tree. Still not technically snowing.
1:59:42 p.m.: Field reporting overrated and cold, going inside.
2:01:30 p.m.: Fire evacuation. Back outside.

Before we make our scandalously accurate data public, we'd like to give the professionals with their "advanced degrees" another shot.

NOAA says: Our governments friends have finally mustered up some optimism. Rather than a measly one to three inches, NOAA has announced a 100 percent chance of three to five inches of snow. With a high of 36 degrees for Friday, any new accumulation won't last too long into the day, especially with snow showers tapering off after the a.m.

Weather.com says: Unfortunately, our friends at the Weather Channel have taken up the dangerous habit of flip-flopping. In the time of writing this article, predicted snowfall for Friday has gone from "heavy snow" to "wintry mix." While residual snow from the last storm will provide for faster accumulation, the 37 high temperatures for the day don't look too promising.

Broadcast media says: Like they really matter. But if they did, NBC 4's forecast is just an entertainment-based regurgitation of weather.com's predictions. Snow will taper off by noon, leaving behind 3-6 inches of luscious snow.

If temperatures dip low enough Thursday night, our "wintry mix" might pave the way to a day off. With showers ending by noon and a high of 36, any new snow on the roads won't last long into the day.

And now drum roll please for the first time in snoWatch history we present two sets of predictions.

With divine intervention
Chance of two-hour delay: 45 percent
Chance of closure: 60 percent
Chance of early-release: 2 percent

If they lied, again
Chance of two-hour delay: 25 percent
Chance of closure: HA! Silly children!
Chance of early-release: none

So if you wake up tomorrow and are pleasantly surprised by a winter wonderland, just thank us please, no checks or money orders.

snoWatch question: If you could be any color snow, what color would you be?

Additional inspiration provided by Jeremy Goodman.



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  • yo-yo on December 8, 2005 at 2:11 PM
    it will snow tonight
  • =] on December 8, 2005 at 2:49 PM
    bleached snow
  • comment on December 8, 2005 at 3:38 PM
    good work, snoWatch team
  • Condescending elder on December 8, 2005 at 3:58 PM
    Not bad. Not bad at all.
  • theweatherman on December 8, 2005 at 5:39 PM
    With divine intervention
    Chance of two-hour delay: 60 percent
    Chance of closure: 45 percent
    Chance of early-release: 2 percent

    ...

    With divine intervention
    Chance of two-hour delay: 45 percent
    Chance of closure: 60 percent
    Chance of early-release: 2 percent

    fix the order of the %s please thanks.
  • it better snow on December 8, 2005 at 5:47 PM
    It'll snow. It'll snow. It'll snow!
  • :) on December 8, 2005 at 5:53 PM
    you guys are totally going to jinx the snow!!!!!

    go knock on wood! NOW!
  • When will the lies end? on December 8, 2005 at 6:09 PM
    The lies will end as soon as you start realizing the difficulty that is weather forecasting. For coastal storms, a track difference of 50 miles can change a 4-8" accumulation of snow to a wintry mix or to a "dusting" of snow. Weather forecasting "flip flops" because more data is collected to give a better picture. If you guys really wanted to see 100% accurate weather forecasting, you would not have heard about this storm until 30 minutes before it started snowing, maybe even less.
  • Anonymous on December 8, 2005 at 6:13 PM
    i will be the color of my body..... RED!!! YAY!!!
  • Snowatcher from winters past on December 8, 2005 at 6:14 PM
    Snowatch has learned to be overconservative. What happened to your meteorogists who would be their jobs on a forecast? (By the way, you won't have school tomorrow.)
  • Optomistic Tired High Schooler on December 8, 2005 at 6:25 PM
    That was a GREAT article and added a smile to a rough day (spending 2 hours in cold was not fun at all!) But, I still school *knocks on wood* will be closed tomorrow.
  • snow!!!! on December 8, 2005 at 6:52 PM
    Love the panda guys XD
  • Silly Child (View Email) on December 8, 2005 at 7:58 PM
    I like ur notes on NOTHING.....and why are you basing your forcasts on others? Shouldn't you make the forcasts, I can go and turn on the tv for two seconds if I wanted to hear their forcasts... And I agree with the guy from winters past or somethen...you guys were right on the last prediction, dont try to be overconservative...

    Oh and how does this percent thing work???
    60+45=105...105>100??
  • hmm on December 8, 2005 at 8:27 PM
    80% chance of 4-8 inches of snow, with a wintry mix (ice as well, icy roads = better chance of school cancellation). And you say 45% of cancellation? I'll put my own predictions:

    Chance of two-hour delay: 90%
    Chance of closure: 75%
    Chance of early-release: 0%, it'll be done snowing by noon.

    I'll do my homework just in case, but I will almost guarentee a delay tommorrow.
  • looking to sleep in on December 8, 2005 at 8:33 PM
    yay snowatch! i'm looking to sleep in tomorrow and not having to do homework...rock on guys!
  • Duh on December 8, 2005 at 9:04 PM
    Who would not want to be yellow snow...

    WATCH OUT WHERE THE HUSKIES GO
    AN' DON'T YOU EAT THAT YELLOW SNOW
    WATCH OUT WHERE THE HUSKIES GO
    AN' DON'T YOU EAT THAT YELLOW SNOW
  • ummm on December 8, 2005 at 9:10 PM
    any color but the absence of sno
  • Me myself an I on December 8, 2005 at 9:44 PM
    It's snowing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SIKE!!!
  • haha! on December 8, 2005 at 9:49 PM
    thank GOD you guys are WRONG!!!! =D
  • yay on December 8, 2005 at 9:51 PM
    It's snowing at my house? Is it at yours? :)
  • To When will the lies... on December 8, 2005 at 10:02 PM
    They know it's not 100% accurate. That's why it's a humor piece. =)
  • Anonymous on December 8, 2005 at 10:34 PM
    we all deserve a snow day after this week.
  • Jon B on December 8, 2005 at 10:49 PM
    YAY YO-YO !!!!! YOU ROCK!!!!! :-D
  • godforsaken in germantown on December 8, 2005 at 11:56 PM
    11:56:54.321 p.m.: Still not snowing
  • Danny Scheer on December 9, 2005 at 6:24 AM
    AY YA! NO SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Satisfied on December 9, 2005 at 4:39 PM
    I think YOU GUYS should be the new meteorologists!!
  • also in Germantown on December 9, 2005 at 5:13 PM
    less than half an inch of snow here in Germantown. Any snow anywhere else?
  • the snow on December 9, 2005 at 6:11 PM
    When will snowatch's lies end, that' my question.
  • MR. XXXXXXXXXX (View Email) on December 10, 2005 at 10:45 AM
    WOW
    THATS WAS HILLARIOUS
    (^(^?(^?^)?^)^)
  • compie 25 on December 14, 2005 at 12:41 PM
    1:59:42 p.m.: Field reporting overrated and cold, going inside.
    2:01:30 p.m.: Fire evacuation. Back outside.

    hahahaa..
  • compie 25 on December 14, 2005 at 12:42 PM
    if i could make snow any color, i would make it polkadot.. i just think that would be cool looking.
  • distressed on December 15, 2005 at 9:27 PM
    why has there been no snowatch for the thursday snow?!
  • Hooray for snow! on December 17, 2005 at 6:35 PM
    Snow would freak me out if it were any other color . . . plus, the white makes everything look fresh and exciting when there's actually enough to cover the ground.
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