Two Weeks too long

Two Weeks Notice doesn't even bother making an effort to be different. It feels like something thrown together in five minutes; as though the producers said, okay, modern romantic comedy: cute actors, cheesy script, stale plot. And it follows that ineffective formula down to the last nauseatingly sappy "make-up and kiss" scene.

The romance is nothing but one long, dragged-out "opposites attract" cliché, without even engaging characters to soften the heavy-handed, overly foreshadowed plot. Oh, the light-hearted banter between two Hollywood stars is entertaining enough... for about five minutes, after which it merely becomes one of the many non-stop irritations of the film.

Another of which is the fact that the entire plot can be discerned from the previews. Two Weeks Notice has been so heavily promoted, every remotely funny part of the movie has already been shown—over and over again—on televisions and movie screens everywhere. Believe me, there really isn't much more to it.

If you're lucky enough not to have viewed one of the omnipresent preview/film summaries, the basic storyline is pretty simple. Lucy Kelson is a young lawyer who is a community activist working against the towering commercialism of millionaire George Wade's construction company, which is constantly destroying aged buildings Lucy believes are akin to sacred relics.

George, however, is uninterested in Lucy's politics; what he needs is a young, female Harvard law school graduate to work as his chief attorney (the young and female parts are George's personal requirements). Lucy, on a quest to stop his architectural destruction, finds herself hired instead.

She works for him for a few months, then a few more, and then some more, with each transition between marked by some corny scene of him irritating her by infringing on her during personal hours. The time jumps are haphazard, and far too frequent to serve any kind of purpose (yet another example of the film's irritating nuances).

Of course, Lucy quits her overbearing boss, and now comes the main section: the two weeks until George lets her go. These are two extremely long weeks. It's obvious to everyone else that Lucy and George are in love, the fact that they don't realize isn't endearing, it merely makes them seem even more idiotic.

Add in the most annoying character of all, a girl named June Carter (Alicia Witt) studying to take Lucy's place, and the movie becomes virtually unwatchable. The only way left to salvage the film would be if the Wade office building exploded and every single main character was annihilated in the space of, say, thirty seconds.

That would be a satisfying end to this monstrosity of spoiled, over-indulged characters, tedious, tepid plot and sickening script. Unfortunately, the real end is much less enjoyable and much more trite. Watch any other revoltingly sentimental romantic comedy (try Sweet November or Autumn in New York) and you've seen Two Weeks Notice... only better.