When colleges say "no"

As one student proudly posts on social media of her acceptance into college, student number two is facing a sad reality that college choice number one is out the window. In a year's time, though, these two students could have reversed sentiments. The reality is, even after visiting a campus, you're still judging a book by its cover. There are so many variables that contribute to an individual's college experience that cannot be truly discovered until he or she is living the college experience.

We all have different priorities when it comes to college selection. Academics is high on most people's lists, but then some might consider the size of the school, the location or possibly the sound of the name (or is that just me?) as important factors. Some are looking for a frat/sorority scene, heavy partying or major sports teams. Your top choice is most likely the one that best fulfills your criteria. And as we know, once you have that top choice, it distances itself from the rest of the schools, which makes rejection much tougher to swallow. But rejection happens. So now what?

It is time for an attitude adjustment.

It is just as likely as not that you caught a break in being rejected by your stretch school. Rather than being locked in a library trying to make the grade at your dream school, you could be acing classes and living relatively stress-free at your reality school. The rigor of academics and the quality of student life may actually be inversely related.

In any case, do not take the rejection personally because you cannot know exactly what went into the admission team's selection process. It could be you did not satisfy the school's demographic need, for example.

So pick yourself off the floor and review other options. There are many great colleges out there, and lots that will be a good fit for you, maybe even a better fit.

Use online resources, such as Naviance/Family Connections that will help you find that perfect fit.

Rejection is part of life. It is never pleasant when it happens, but when you get over your understandable initial disappointment, the good news is there are plenty of fine schools out there for you. Come September, you will be absorbed in classes, making new friends and acquainting yourself with your new community. That feeling of rejection will be a distant memory.