How to solve the Redskins' Woes


Nov. 24, 2003, midnight | By Isamu Bae | 20 years, 5 months ago

A Blazer's way


In the light of all that has happened to the Redskins, from their successful start to their dismal stretch, and possibly even back to success, many analysts, including the coaches of the Redskins themselves, have attempted to concoct a solution of victory. Thinking 'hey, why not,' I have created my own set of answers to solve the woes of the Redskins.

The biggest problem for the Redskins appears to be the protection scheme. You know what? Patrick Ramsey should treat his protection to dinner. Repeatedly. They're big men, about an average of 280 pounds, I would assume. These free dinners might sway them to put an extra effort into protecting the source of their meals. Daunte Culpepper (QB, Minnesota Vikings) did it this year and it looks like his offensive linemen are more concerned about protecting him than ever (280 pounds! Think of how expensive it must be to feed five people that weigh an average of 280 pounds! That's more than twice my weight!).

Another problem for the Redskins is their lack of big plays. For a team loaded with so much speed, it is amazing how rarely they make plays surpassing 20 yards. There is a simple solution. Play the good old game of 500.

Ramsey: 20 yards. Hut. Hut. Hike! 50!
Coles: *catches the ball* Yeah! That's 500!
Gardener: Next time, man, next time.

Running the ball should be completely given up on. In fact, the Redskins should take this whole thing to another level. Tight end? Put a tackle in there. Halfback? Bah. Put another lineman. If Spurrier seriously wants to do his Fun N' Gun then ditch the running game altogether. Fun N' Gun N' Don't Run.



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Isamu Bae. Isamu Bae (AKA Izzy) is a senior and finally put up his staff bio. He's 17 and has no idea what he's supposed to put here, so this is all some filler material. He writes, draws, reads, plays games, practices martial arts (for lack of … More »

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