Expensive gifts for the holidays


Dec. 16, 2003, midnight | By Isamu Bae | 20 years, 3 months ago

Top 10 outrageous, ridiculously priced gifts


It is that time of the year again. Yep, Christmas shopping time is now here, and what better way to please those close to you than to buy them a super grandiose gift (and hopefully get one back… or else…). Here we bring you this year's biggest, baddest (not really), top 10 expensive gifts for your loved ones.

10) One of things people love to do is chew gum. Lots of gum. So much gum, in fact, that schools do not exactly like them anymore. But gum is chewed anyways. Well, what better gift than to provide an extremely large supply of gum? Hammacher Schlemmer presents the Route 66 Gumball Machine at your local dealer for only $2,499.95. At such a low price, gumballs are obviously not included, but it can hold up to 3,500 of them!

9) Continuing with the necessities of people is Ticonderoga's new Ticonderoga Pencil Recycler for only $999.95. It comes with a pencil sharpener, which collects the pencil shaving, and uses a compacting mechanism with heat to solidify the shavings back into the shape of a pencil around a stick of granite. Save wood, save money, recycle your pencil shavings.

8) Anyone remember Pez? Those portable hand-held candy machines are back with a vengeance, and some shine. FAO Schwartz 2003 toy catalogue presents the Swavorski crystal studded Pez dispensers coming in three different crystal studded models- Goofy, Tigger, and Kermit. $165 each.

7) Technology reaches another level for children with the new Palm set from Dell. A one cubic centimeter computer that connects to a 10 centimeter monitor, together with enough ports for a palm digital camera, a palm printer, a palm scanner, and a palm DVD burner. All for the discount price of $1899.95.

6) DM Vortex presents a $1,499 unicycle for your unicycling pleasure. Forget bicycles that cost a fraction of the unicycle, you cannot get the exhilaration of almost falling every second! Comes with a 26-inch wheel and hydraulic brakes.

5) Tired of carrying around CDs? Tired of having to listen to the same tracks over and over again after a long vacation? Well, fear no more. Intel surprises the world with its one terabytes of storage monster, terraSound, the new cutting edge MP3 Player with two megabits per second clarity. terraSound also has satellite capabilities, reaching into the heavens to allow users to share MP3s with other terraSound users around the world! This behemoth of an MP3 player calls in at $999.99.

4) Dreams come true with TS Electric's brand new Sojourner shoes. Sojourner has the built-in capabilities to change from track shoes to roller blades and even to soccer cleats. With five different settings and over 10 options at the shoe type, Sojourner is a true all-in-one fitting for your foot. But that's not all. Sojourner uses breakthrough technology to use air pressure to lessen the burden on your foot when running, leading to an apparent increase in stamina, airtime, and running speed. Sojourner costs $499.99, and different shoe settings are not included.

3) Children have always wanted to drive, staring at their parents and dreaming of the time when at last they would take the wheel onto the road. Now, FAO Schwartz allows even eight year olds to drive, without a driver's license, in realistic minivans. The $30,000 junior minivan comes equipped to drive in rough terrain, and the optional $20,000 caravan brings its own lavatory, lockers, and dining room.

2) Star Wars comes to life! Get your own artificial intelligence machine. It is a black, circular disk that uses satellite technology to check with LT Teknik's information database, continually updating itself and growing with a limitless A.I. system. Of course, the program itself is not completely perfect right now, but in the next several years… A.I. Disk costs $4,999.95 right now.

1) At last #1. Ever wanted to meet an NBA super star? Wanted to have him visit your house once? Well dream no more. LEGO presents the NBA life-size superstars, made fully with logo, wearing an authentic NBA team jersey. It costs a measly $15,000 to have Jason Kidd or Allan Houston stand in your home.

As crazy as all of these toys may sound, half of them are the real deal. Happy shopping!



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Isamu Bae. Isamu Bae (AKA Izzy) is a senior and finally put up his staff bio. He's 17 and has no idea what he's supposed to put here, so this is all some filler material. He writes, draws, reads, plays games, practices martial arts (for lack of … More »

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